Online dating profile creator

Posted by / 08-Jan-2015 13:36

Online dating profile creator

And being the least creative person in the universe while living in Portland is such a challenge that I can only assume you’re doing it on purpose. If you absolutely must talk about liking coffee, don’t just list the word “coffee” under “Things I Like.” Tell everyone why you like it and be specific. For example: I was backpacking through Costa Rica and I met this really hot local guy at one of those grass-hut-style bars on the beach and he invited me to come see the coffee plantation where he worked.I helped him pick beans for six hours just because he looked really hot without a shirt, but these drug cartels raided the place with machine guns and we had to hide in the jungle while they destroyed everything.If I were a guy, I’d want to start conversations with all of you about as badly as I want to listen to Gilbert Gottfried sing “Le Nozze di Figaro” eight times in a row while being water-boarded by Osama Bin Laden’s rotting zombie corpse.It’s totally illogical, not to mention unfair, hypocritical and somewhere along the lines of a double standard, for you to expect guys to flood your in-boxes with “interesting conversation” when your profiles are excruciatingly boring. I can’t live without my family, my friends, music, books, coffee or my phone, and I love to eat!Let them take for granted that you’re a decent, sane human being and move on to what makes you .It can be as easily taken for granted as your love for your family. And by the way, if you live in Portland, Oregon, and your dating profile says you like coffee, you should be deleted, not just from Plenty of Fish or Ok Cupid, but from the planet, because you are the least creative person in the universe.I know you think your amazingly cute selfies are going to do all the work for you, but guess what, there are about six billion cute selfies clogging up every dating site in existence. If you want to attract guys with personalities and engage their hearts and minds, you have to demonstrate that you posses such things yourself. Since the beginning of human history, people have used narrative to establish unique individual identities. I like adventure and travel and learning new things. Message me if you can say something interesting, don’t just say Hi or hit on me.” Look, there are certain things that make us human.If the only bait you’re gonna give a guy is your looks, the only responses you’ll get will be things like, “Hi, you’re hot. None of you want to think you’re the typical, average woman. I’m about to tell you how to make your dating profile significantly less boring by using a couple of very basic writing tricks to tell your story.“What to say… A love for your family and friends, a need to eat, a desire to laugh, a taste for adventure and music are pretty much universal.

I basically got paid to start conversations for him.I perused about a hundred female dating profiles each day for a month.alike, and they’re about as intriguing as the month-old chunk of ground beef growing mold behind my stove.I’ve been addicted to coffee ever since because it gives me super intense flashbacks. Don’t just write “I like books.” Pick at least one author without whose words you would actually consider becoming a serial killer, and tell everyone why you like them so much.Unless you’re a serial killer, you probably share these traits with the rest of the human race.

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So start by assuming guys are looking to date non-serial-killers.